Can you ever go home again?

So, my family and I took a trip to visit my extended family in a rural area of West Virginia. I have such fond memories of my grandparent's farm, and feel that much of my current way of interacting with the world, can be traced back to time spent getting dirty, doing risky things, and exploring nature on said farm. Yet now, I find that the adult that I am struggles to stand on common ground with the family that I visit three or four times a year. At one time, my extended family were the people who grounded me. It was the place that I always felt unconditionally loved and accepted. And, to a certain extent that will always be true, but now that I am in a different state, educated with a career, I find that there are certain discrepancies between our values, beliefs, and opinions about how one should live one's life.

Conversations often come to a standstill, and I feel like there's a club I just don't belong to. I'm not sure that it will ever change, so I continue to feel like someone straddling cultures and hoping no one ever calls my bluff because I would feel like I had somehow let them down. Why do I never recognize the moments they let me down? Maybe because they ingrained unconditional so deeply within me, even as they couldn't seem to follow their own teachings. The conditions get stifling sometimes, but I know who I am, and, with love for what has become truth as well as them, I refuse to allow them to affect that any more.